TESTIMONY OF VICTIMS: THE FAILURE of diocesan
authorities to deal properly with complaints compounded the wrong
perpetrated by abusing priests, according to the Cloyne report.
Without
exception, people who made complaints about priests in the Cloyne
diocese felt let down by the institutional church and many of them
ceased to have any belief in the Catholic religion, it says.
The
last chapter of the report deals with the effects of abuse on the lives
of those who made complaints and their family circle. It says all the
complainants experienced great difficulty in revealing the abuse and
points out that none of it was reported at the time it was happening.
“Most
complainants continued to live in the small towns and parishes in which
they were reared and in which the abuse occurred. Their difficulties
were compounded by the fact that the alleged abuser was usually still in
the area and still held in high regard by their families and the
community.”
Even after the abuse stopped, the abusers continued to
officiate at family weddings and funerals and, in one case, the
complainant’s own wedding.
Many complainants thought there were no
other people abused by their abuser. Even when they reported the abuse
as adults, they remained under this impression because the diocese never
told them of other cases.
Two people attempted suicide; other
problems included difficulty managing anger, self-destructive behaviour,
depression, isolation and poor self-esteem.
One person revealed
the abuse to a friend, 30 years after it happened: “I remember . . . the
feeling of revulsion that swept over me, the constant need to put my
hand over my mouth in case I’d get sick. The feeling that there were
golf balls stuck in my throat . . .”
The person continued: “I
remember the smell of incense, the bible, the open confessions, the
removal of his collar when he wanted to touch me more intimately.
Nightmares, waking up with a sense of him standing by my bed and my head
at his hips. Feverish nightmares, glimpses at events that had taken
place but never enough to get a full picture. Separate instances.
“They
all mulch into one, one long brain-turning, nauseating roll of events.
My head being pushed down, my body being invaded, the weight of his body
on me.”
Some of those who complained were left feeling complicit
in the abuse, and all had great
difficulty establishing and maintaining
personal relationships.
The report concludes: “No action can
totally alleviate the anger and hurt suffered by the complainants but
the commission hopes that this acknowledgement, and the publication of
this report may, in some instances, assuage the hurt and anger
justifiably felt by them.”